Watching Wimbledon on an American Holiday

July 4, 2010 at 4:49 pm (Uncategorized)

It’s the fourth of july and personally I could care less. Don’t get me wrong, I’d rather be here than anywhere else in the world. Actually that’s not true but for the sake of this blog let’s just pretend. As I was saying, I don’t care too much for this holiday. Red, white, and blue is almost too standard and as far as those three colours go, anything goes. There will be people painting their faces and wearing outrageous costumes, maybe even riding bikes in a g-string with a flag sticking out of their crack. It’s all very plausible and I think that as far as American’s go, they’ve stretched patriotism to its breaking point. No other country that I know of celebrates their independence day with such vigor and violence. [Besides don’t they realize that the Union Jack is also red, white and blue for nearly the same reasons?]

Worst of all it usually comes at a time where everyone else in the world is prepared to ignore them and their loud booming fireworks. After all I’ve been keeping myself busy by watching Wimbledon and the World Cup; the two things that America is currently not part of. Thank goodness. If Andy Roddick and the US football team [soccer, people, soccer] had managed to beat out Nadal for the trophy and stomped Ghana into the ground who knows how huge this 4th of July would be. But it’s not like the US would neccessarily rub that in their faces, huh? It’s not like every other day they go around toting guns to promote ‘democracy’.

But while I’m here I might as well say ‘Happy birthday’ to the youngest superpower in the world. They’ve made it through more than 250 years of colic and are now just trying to get out of the terrible twos. All those pains are just growing pains and sooner rather than later they’ll find themselves in that age where acne is prevalent. Rest assured, China, Russia, and maybe old hated grandma Britian will tell them, that the acne and awkwardness will go away soon enough. Common sense will hit as hard as bricks and all their silly childhood notions will melt away. Maybe they will realize that everyone being different is a really good thing and that without diversity all things would fall. And maybe then they will stop hating themselves for being a body of many colours and races.

So happy birthday, America.

And many more….


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